Saturday, January 01, 2005

The Similarity of Difference

As someone rightly mentioned in a comment, being "different" is today in vogue. It is considered the "in" thing. But, what really does one mean by "different"? Does having a dream make one different? Does wanting to be a rockstar or a poet make one different? Not really, if you ask me. Each one of us has a dream....so having a dream is in no way a factor that makes us "different". Wanting to be a Harsh a Bhogle or a Kalpana Chawla is not being "different".

Then what is? Being yourself. Today, most of us are too caught up in being "politically correct", we are too obsessed with living up to standards we perceive as having been set.....standards that we must meet to justify our status in life. We are too obsessed with these to pursue our dreams....and more importantly, we are too caught up in this to ever express ourselves in the true sense of the word....

When was the last time you had to say something you didn't really believe in, just because you knew if you said something different, you would be, well, politically incorrect, or else, because you felt your view wouldn't go down too well.....chances are it happens pretty often...with most of us, it happens daily....several times....we must say certain things, because, well, that's the done thing.....and THAT is what I object to....why must we conform? Why must everyone think alike? Being an I-Banker in NY is to be successful. Does anyone ever oppose this in a public forum? Errrr....I think not.....not the "done thing", y'know....

Someone I know said that to be oneself, would be to be selfish. I think not. Actually, if anything, it is possibly the exact opposite. If you are yourself, you are letting the other person know just who you are. After that, at least you know that if you have a friend, that friend is yours, not the friend of that fictitious being you project yourself as. You can't let down this friend, because this friend obviously knows you and therefore knows what to expect from you. You can't betray that person's trust.....

4 comments:

Zarine said...

Ho hmmmmm...the post seems like a cocktail of many feelings.Let's get the funda of being 'different' straight first.Bhogle and Chawla became what they did,coz they followed their dreams.Not the society 'in' norms.Example was stated to purely validate the statement that dare to dream,then to acheive that dream.Many dont.And then brag abt not being allowed to do what they want.That's a choice you make.I never said,be Harsha/Kalpana.I only meant,such folks exist.

Next,being yourself isn't selfish.But being yourself at someone else's cost is.Bypassing someone to serve your purpose is.And dont tell me,one cant survive or get ahead without trampling others.There are ways,provided you care to find out.But then again,going with the flow was always easy.So,here we are,doing the same old thing,the same old way.

Darth Midnightmare said...

Zarine, you've just stated what I did. There is no such thing as "different" the way it is perceived. The difference comes in if you follow what you want. As far as being the "bragging" you mention, I'd rather call it a "defence". But I agree it sucks. I don't subscribe to that school of thought.

At the same time, the point I am making is that "being correct" takes you away from yourself several times....and the emphasis on correctness often creates outcasts out of people that, at the core of things are actually the norm....well, my view entirely, and I don't expect anyone to subscribe to it....just a thought of mine that I believe in.

Anonymous said...

Ellie says..

In the end....we'll all do what brings us more satisfaction somewhere...whatever will provide answer to the most questions that the practical brain asks.Theories and subconsciuos prodding will still go on.It is the instinctive urge of the mind to not conform and habitative action to go ahead and just do that.

Rajat said...

We conform because our mind does not want the troubles that arise from non-conformity.....think u will agree that non-confirmity leads to attention, and many of us do not want that attention....they just want to blend into the background....those who truly seek glory and fame strive to be non-conformists!