Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Random Conversations in MPD

"I'm sure this is the best way you know. It's the right thing and it's bound to work out correctly.....as per the plan. It's a no-brainer almost."

"Hmmm...I think the no-brainer is you actually. I see absolutely no way this thing is ever going to work out the way you want it to. It's silly to think about it actually.....pointless. You've refused to see every damn obstruction and when I point them out to you, you choose to just ignore them....you brush them off and behave as if they're inconsequential. Things don't work that way..."

"Oh, shut up! You're the one that always screws up everything. Who in Hell's name are you to advise me? You think I'm silly? Go on, tell me what happened the last time I told you to do something and you stopped because of all those stupid obstructions you saw? What happened after that? You're just playing the role of a wimp right now. Know what the problem is with you? You're too damn scared. That's all there is to it....the shell, the damned show, the lies, the self-deception....it all boils down to the fear...."

"Fair enough. So I over-estimated once or maybe, and I'll grant you this, I was late in reacting. I may even have made a misjudgment! But the fact remains that at no point was I illogical. Nor was I rash and stupid. I did what I considered was the most logical thing to do at that time....and I stand by my view that it was correct. I see no reason why one event should change anything at all...and as for fear, go to Hell.....I'm not afraid....not of you....and not of myself...."

"Well, in that case, why are you in this shape now? Remember when it was me? We were happier then, weren't we? Now all you do is impose yourself and make both of us miserable. Look back and face facts.....that was the right way and it still is. You've made a royal hash of things, but it's not irredeemable yet. There's time......turn back......trust me..."

"Trust? You? You've got to be kidding me. All you did was to get us into trouble. It's just that the way we were then, it didn't matter to either of us....the thoughts were nothing like they are now, nor were the costs of our actions.....and look at the biggest thing that happened. Was that you or me? That was me.....not you......not your irreverant way of treating things, your blind optimism....your misplaced faith...."

"It would have happened much before if it was me you know....I know you keep saying that it would not have happened at all if it had been me and I know that you also say that even if it had happened, it would have not been anywhere close to as good as it was. But the fact is that you say these things solely because you're a damned cynic. A cynic who will always keep hiding behind that cloak of "logic", which you use to hide your fear away..."

"Bullshit! You're an optimist? Fair enough.....but you're also the biggest cynic I have ever met! I'm a realist. I see what bad things can happen....very true.....I look at every situation with a view to determining what could possibly go wrong and yes, I do attach more importance to weighing the potential loss.....but I still feel bad when something bad happens, whether to me or someone else......it hurts me. Not you...... You delight in the events when something bad that you foresaw actually happens. You have the 'I told you so' stance then......I, on the other hand, feel bad about the fact that it happened, that I wasn't wrong and that I couldn't do a damn thing to stop the event happening....inspite of knowing....."

"You'll never be happy you know.....you're too scared.....too logical......try waking up to the fact that at times you should just let go......flow with it....allow yourself to be carried away by what you feel like doing...."

"You'll never get it.....logic is everywhere...in everything......you just have to get it right, that's all....the interpretation I mean.....and that's why you'll always be in trouble......you will never see the right path, because you're blind....

And you know what will happen if I do what you're saying? It'll screw up everything even more......not that it seems like there is anything much left, to be honest. But your ideas will ruin everything we have!!!! Can't you see reason? It's numbing to think that you have absolutely no idea what your scheme and idea entails!!!"

"You're a scared cynic"

"No.....you're just blind and stupid..."

I guess I just must myself.....

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now that was an interesting....my conversation with me ;)
~Natasha

luke said...

well i guess u do tend to be defensive sometimes ..as a defensive mechanism.....tahts when u reason out and have conversations wid urself....happens wid me very often!!!

Jonas said...

Now why do I feel there was more of an attachment to the self in italics rather than the other chap?...
hmm, now what could that mean?....
umm, lets see...

Darth Midnightmare said...

@anon: Hmm....thanx.

@Luke: Err....yeah....but then again, defensiveness is so often confused with logic....which is which?

Jonas: Isn't that just like asking whether you like your left ear more or your right?