Monday, April 25, 2005

Stained Glass Windows

She looked a lot more frail than when he had last seen her. Though it had been only four months since they had met last, she seemed to have aged ten years. Yet now, as he sat there, he felt at peace. He'd just been through his own private Hell, but he knew how insignificant it was in comparison. It was one of the few things that had kept him going all through.

As he buried his face in her hair, his mind went back to the night before when he'd stood looking out at the sea. It was a beautiful place. Right across the bay, he could see the arc of lights from the marina, they looked beautiful at night. And the dark water below.....the entire thing seemed like life itself...dreams etched in our minds, with the darkness of reality all that separates us from them. So near, and yet so far....just like it had always been.....

He came back to the moment abruptly as he felt her drawing away from him. "Go away". Her voice was firm, there was no hint of a quiver or any wavering. It was almost as if she'd decided after a great deal of thought and was totally convinced. Knowing her as he did, he also knew it was probably the way it really was. "I can't. I won't. Not now....not like this". He reached out for her hand...she drew it away.....that hurt even more than the words.

Sometimes, things just aren't what you'd like them to be. What do you do when faced with a choice that affects too many things that matter? Do you forfeit your desire for someone else's happiness? At times, yes, it seems the done thing, when that person has done enough for you to make it seem the right choice......but what when that choice is something that will determine the course of life itself?

Do you settle for something that will work though your heart's not in it? Or do you choose to pursue a dream that seems so unlikely that it's dangerous......damn, no one ever said life was easy, but there seemed to be too many things to decide right now....

"Why? Don't be stupid. Just go. It's better that way, and you know it. I'm not going to be here you know, so you might as well realize that now". "I do.....but I'm still going to be here..."

5 comments:

red said...

somethings are left on time...

neeta said...

*hug*
A chink in the armour... or the breaking down of some walls?
I'd call it a glimpse of who you are.

Darth Midnightmare said...

Red: Time heals most things....almost all things...but there are occasions when the only thing you don't have is time....although you are faced with infinity

Neeta: No...no chinks and Fort Knox is secure...

As far as glimpses are concerned, evenfiction, however obscure, reveals facets of the creator. After all, no thought is ever unrelated to who you really are...

The man without any belief said...

...They just dont die, do they? I mean,you may break or shatter the vase if you will, but the scent of the rose will linger there still.

O.K. C'mon. Now. Take some time to get over my yet another pathetic attempt at penning down those ever-elusive abstractions of reality.
[...Oh yeah, the laddie reckons himself a poet.]

Hey dude. Wassup?

panic said...

Knox....the scottish theologian???